Here is a list of general conclusions I have made which I now realize have been wrong.
|Events||Wrong Conclusions||Honest Conclusions|
Someone says, |
I want the old Matt back.
They don't love me.
They don't care about me or understand me, and don't want to.
|They have observed a negative change in my behavior.|
|Something awful happened and no one was there to help.||
No one cares enough to help me when I need it. All my friends have abandoned me.
|I am mourning a loss. My feelings tell me to blame others. Some events I have to go through I could never predict or control. When life changes dramatically I know I will mourn the loss.|
They have no idea what I am going through.
Their good intentions are destroying me.
They have betrayed me.
|The simplest explanation is the most likely: This is a symptom of depression. It would be a well coordinated attack if everyone turned on me. If I only worry about this well coordinated behavior of good people, I would ignore the possibility that something inside is causing this feeling.|
I feel so angry and sad.
I can feel it pulsing through my body.
Sometimes I can even ||
Feelings are logical by nature.
I feel angry or sad only for a very good reason.
I am more angry so this is an extremely good reason.
I don't need to control these feelings because they are appropriate.
|Feelings are chemical by nature. There are chemicals pulsing through me which will control my actions, and poison me. I feel more angry or sad because my body is producing too many bad chemicals and not enough good chemicals.|
|After feeling angry and sad, sometimes I feel calmer after some time or the next morning.||
I got over it.
|This is evidence of the chemistry in my body recovering. This proves that my sadness and anger are chemical in nature, like a drug . I don't want the chemicals in my body so I will increase my nutrition and will take vitamins to counteract these feelings.|
- My body is making chemicals which make me feel the way I do, but I will gain control.
- Indulging in negative feelings and thoughts is no different than indulging in drugs.
- I will not be addicted to bad feelings, because there is a better way.
I am attaching a negative value to so many things,
thatI can't feel happy.
When I am calm, I will analyze why something makes me feel so bad.
I will realize feeling bad is only a chemical taking control.
If it is bad, I will realize that I will hurt my freedom and my body by continuing to feel
I will be in control
not the chemicals in my body. When I am too angry or sad I will realize that I cannot be logical. I will distract my emotions by doing something else until I can think about something without feeling bad about it. I will not think aboutthings that make me feel bad, because I will be destroyed if I do, and no good will come of it. If I must think about it I will learn not to feel bad about that event before I try to think through it.